Deciding

Deciding to write tonight. Think about it most nights, and find something else to occupy my brain. But always wanting to put it all down.
Always wanting to create that calendar.
You learn something new everyday.
Today, I learned...I am naive.
I want to live in a quiet, quaint community that the childhood me, believes I grew up in
. I want to not feel like a fool when I am caught with my doors unlocked. I want to not feel the pit in my stomach, when there is a moment with no barking as Uncle Jerry patted down the house. What if someone hurt our Luke? I despise living in fear, and perhaps that is why I am lackadaisical about locking my doors. I don't want to live in fear. I want to believe in our neighborhood. I want to have faith in our world. Yep, like I said....naive.
So what does that mean for me? Do I have to harden up, perhaps just wise up? But there is so much good in the world. I believe it can rise. But, I need to be wise. I will be stronger and smarter when it comes to protecting my family.
That is what I learned today.